Bringing up the idea of a divorce to your spouse can, naturally, be tricky. You don’t want to make your significant other angry, but you also know that they may not want to hear what you have to say. You struggle to figure out how to bring it up in an effective manner.
If you feel this way, you’re not alone. The first thing you need to do is to make sure you bring up the subject at a time when you both feel calm and comfortable. Don’t do it in anger. Don’t do it during an argument. Wait until you can both have a rational, calm conversation about it. People often say things in anger and then double down on those positions, even if they realize they made a mistake. By picking a calm time, you massively reduce conflict.
You also want to have this conversation when there are no distractions or time limits. For the best results, you need to have this kind of conversation when:
- The kids are at school, not when they’re at home, and nobody else is expected to be around
- You have basically unlimited time to talk, not when you know you have to leave for work in ten minutes
- You can focus only on the conversation at hand, without any other outside pressures
Does this make the conversation you need to have easy? Certainly not. But it can take that stressful edge away make things go more smoothly. That’s what you want here, especially if you’re interested in mediation and other tactics to work together with your spouse. After you get the process started, be sure you also take the time to look into your legal options. You need to know as much as you can about both your rights and your obligations moving forward.