Parents who make the decision to divorce often have a difficult time transitioning to life as co-parents instead of spouses. That’s a big difference that has to be addressed during this time. In order to be as successful as possible when you’re co-parenting, you have to come up with a parenting plan and follow it.
One of the most important things to remember as you develop this plan is that you have to focus on the children. With the exception of abuse or something that could endanger the children, the reason for the divorce shouldn’t come up in the child custody negotiations.
Another critical area of co-parenting is communication. You and your ex can’t just forget about each other. You’ll have to communicate like adults with mutual respect. Setting the terms for communication now can be very helpful as you navigate upcoming parenting challenges.
Always communicate directly with your co-parent. Never try to use the children as messengers. When you communicate only with the other parent, there’s less of a chance that things will be misunderstood. It also ensures that the children aren’t put in a precarious position of delivering messages and getting negative reactions.
Co-parents should always try to work together to give the children what they need. This can involve supporting each other and trying to compromise on issues when you don’t see eye-to-eye. Even though the divorce and the situations that led up to it might have caused some animosity, putting all of that aside and focusing solely on the children is beneficial.
The parenting plan is key to these situations. You should include detailed provisions in the plan so that both of you can refer back to it as necessary while raising your children.